Hello fellow Lymies and those of you who may just be curious,
So, I have finished all of my quad passes (9 of them), and my 10 passes (3 of them). I just met with my doctor last week to go over how I am feeling and to get blood work done to see if these treatments are working. My results won't be in until next week, but I am here to talk about my journey thus far. How I feel, and the struggles I still meet face-to-face with, every day.
I'm not going to lie, I had high hopes going into this treatment plan. I had been through oral antibiotics, other medications, and tons of detox modalities. I truly believed this was going to be my saving grace, but I can't get down about it until my results come back. You may ask why I am depressed about the potential outcome, and I'll say that's because I don't feel much better. In the beginning, I saw some progress, but I fear my body got used to the treatments and left me at a stalemate. I have developed HORRIBLE joint pain, more headaches, inflammation, and ongoing exhaustion. With that being said, this is why I am not hopeful. I am scared because I have no plan on what to do next. If this isn't working, what will?
At my last doctor appointment, he mentioned that I try a residential facility in Florida. I too think he feels I'm not making progress at his clinic. Living in Florida for a month sounds like a dream, but $30,000 to be admitted doesn't give me butterflies! The facility offers lodging on campus and IV treaments everyday, for one month. If money weren't an issue, I still don't think I'd want to spend an entire month, in a hospital setting, everyday, being hooked up to IVs. Don't sign me up for that! I'd rather enjoy what health I have left than spend days in treatment. If I knew this were the answer, then yeah, I'd definitely do it, but as you all know, with Lyme, we don't know the cure. So for now, I'll hold on to this tiny bit of hope that I am getting better, until the results come back and I am told otherwise.
Perhaps, one day, I'll get back to my old self. The girl who was so full of joy, adventure, heart, and soul...not this shell of a person who can't find the fun in life anymore. I've been told by loved ones, time and time again, that they miss who I used to be....and I can't help but totally agree. This is why I now understand why the suicide rate for people with Lyme has become so high. This disease is a constant battle with the devil. In the end, I hope to defeat this monster that lives inside.
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